A little Friday humor...

Discussion in 'The Tiger's Den' started by joetiger, Sep 20, 2002.

  1. joetiger

    joetiger Freshman

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    On a tour of Louisiana, the Pope took a couple of days off his itinerary to visit a wildlife swamp area on an impromptu sightseeing trip. His 4X4 Pope mobile was along the shore when there was an enormous commotion heard from the middle of the swamp. The entourage rushed to see what was making the noise.

    Upon approaching the scene, the Pope noticed a hapless man in the water wearing a Tulane jersey who was struggling frantically to free himself from the jaws of a 25-foot alligator. At that moment an airboat containing three men wearing LSU jerseys roared into view from around the point.

    Immediately, one of the men took aim and fired a harpoon into the alligator's ribs, immobilizing it instantly. The other two reached out, pulled the Green Wave man from the water and using long clubs, beat the gator to death. They bundled the bleeding, semi-conscious man into the boat along with the dead gator and prepared for a hasty retreat when they heard frantic shouting from the shore. It was the Pope summoning them to the beach.

    After they reached shore, the Pope praised them for the rescue and said, "I give you my blessing for your brave actions. I had heard that bitter hatred existed between LSU and Tulane, but now I have seen with my own eyes this is not true. I can see that your society is a truly enlightened example of explicit harmony and could serve as a model on which other states could follow". He blessed them all and drove off.

    As he departed, the harpooner asked the others, "Who was that?"

    "That," one answered, "was his Holiness the Pope. He is in direct contact with God and has access to all of God's wisdom. "

    "Well," the Tiger harpooner replied, "he don't know nothing about catching gators. Is the bait holding up okay or do we need to get another one?
     
  2. Bengal B

    Bengal B Founding Member

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    Here are a couple more:

    An LSU fan and a Tulane fan were down a country road at high speed in opposite directions late one night. They had a terrible head on collision and both cars flipped end over end and were totally destroyed. Miraculously neither the Tiger fan or the Tulane fan were injured. As they approched each other to figure out what to do the Tiger fan told the Tulane fan that the fact that they both survived was a miricle and must be a sign from God that the Tigers and Greenies should put aside all the animosity of the past and become friends. Then the Tiger fan noticed that the trunk of his car had popped open and after further investigation discovered that an unopened half gallon of Jack Daniels had not been broken it the wreck. The Tiger fan opend the bottle and told the Tulane fan that this was another sign from God and that they should drink the Jack Daniels to toast their newfound friendship. The Tulane fan drank half the bottle down and handed it back to the Tiger fan. The Tiger fan just stood there holding the half full bottle until the Tulane fan asked him if he was going to drink it. The Tiger fan told the Tulane fan "No, I don't think so. I'll just wait here until the police arrive"

    After watching the Greenies take yet another beating in Tiger Stadium a group of Tulane fans headed back to New Orleans in a pickup truck and since there wasn't room for all of them in the cab some of them had to ride in the back. There was an accident on the spillway and the truck went over the guard rail and sunk in the water beneath the spillway. A guy who saw the accident happen stopped his car and dived into the water to try to save them. After repeated dives he finally gave up and back up to the interstate. By that time the police had arrived and the guy told them that all the Tulane fans had drowned, including the ones in the back of the truck. He told them "They put up a hell of a fight to save themselves but they just couldn't get the tailgate down"
     

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