Spinoff from LaSalle asking about how it felt walking daughter down aisle. Didn't want to derail the other thread. @LaSalleAve For you to even think about that while she (your daughter) is young tells me you're a good dad so it's gonna sting, no doubt. Everything we do bringing them up is to help them become independent then, the closer the get to those, the more it leaves a void in many ways. Ironically, as tough as it was and as much as I dreaded having to, when they were young and growing up, it's something I often worried about as in NOT being there should something happen to me. Not being able to do that for them worried me just as much as having to do that cause I knew it would be cast a sadness of sorts over the ceremony. Being there was no big deal in terms of it being "important" to the ceremony but not being there, I felt, would be. I felt for the groom's mom cause most of the attn is on the bride/bride's family so the groom's mom kinda gets shelved. I made it a point to reach out to her and verbalized that. The guys were bar b Quinn and sipping all day. The girls were at my house having a professional do their makeup and hair. The groom's mom gets stuck in there, away from her kid so it's a different perspective. The groom's father gets to spend day with him. Any others here walk their daughter(s) down the aisle?
I'll be doing that when my oldest gets back from her 18 months abroad. They haven't set an exact date yet, but she has told me it would be soon after she gets back. I'm looking forward to it.
good perspective. At this point I dread this day. Because like you said, I really hope I make it that long. Lots of things can happen in that much time and I want to be there to support her on what's supposed to be the most important day of her life.
Father of an only son here. He's engaged (long engagement, May of '18), so we've got plenty of time to prepare. My wife thinks about the aspect above, often. She's not the kind of person who wants the spotlight, but she doesn't want to feel pushed aside on that day either. I worry about that, and I'm sure I'll have to be very attentive to that on that day. As for the perspective of walking a daughter down the aisle...well, won't be happening for me. I can certainly see how that would be a very emotional experience. My wife and I are in a transition now, as our son is only about 7 months of college and more than a year away from that big day. He's living and working in Birmingham (where he says the people say "Roll Tide" like its a period at the end of a sentence.) Its so satisfying to hear about his early successes and know that we got things right with him. His fiance' is a master's student in health care administration, he's learning the bank biz; they're going to do great. Meanwhile, we're adjusting to life without a "child" in the house (I know, they're always your children), and I have to say this is a very happy time of life, maybe the happiest I've been since newlywed days. I would hope every father walking his daughter down the aisle can feel the same sense of fulfillment.
one of my dad's favorite expressions is "don't worry cher, they'll be back and they bring more with them"
That's the text I received from her yesterday, Thank you for the wedding, it was the best night ever. Made it all worth it cause I knew, in the end, we'd gotten it right. Same here. I work at a place with 60 employees and several of them are asking today about not having heard about the wedding. I told them I didn't talk about it cause it wasn't about me. I know just reading that in isolation on here sounds assholish but I don't like to distract from work and I also want the spotlight to be where it needs to be. I also didn't want them to pass something around asking for money to give cause I have this thing about that. I did discuss it with a few of the ones I work closest with but they know me well enough to know not to advertise. I'm not nearly an attn whore in real life like I am here. I asked my wife and the groom's mom, early on, to let this be about them (bride/groom). I see parents go nuts over the planning of showers, wedding, etc. Now they even have an "Engagement Party" and a "Honey-do" shower for the guy. Good grief. Everyone says how grandkids are even more enjoyable. Can't imagine that but looking forward to finding out later on, I guess.
Make sure you kick this thread when that time comes. From things you've posted over the years, I know you were a good dad and have a good relationship with your girls.
I was given a honey-do shower 27 years ago. It was quite helpful. My wife had two showers, one given at her profession and one by her sisters. I don't know what will happen with the wedding process for my son. I have a niece just starting her third tri-mester. She had a "reveal party" where they announced the sex of the baby. No gifts involved, but was that really necessary? Then a shower, that my wife told me afterward was not women only, and she says, in its size and atmosphere felt more like a wedding reception than a baby shower. All that combined with what I've seen at the most recent weddings I've been to, its like the current generation sees weddings as being more about putting on a show than a ceremony for commitment.
Man we must be related. THAT was the point I made, saying they need to focus more on the thereafter. They've dated a long time and are really "friends" too but we all know how marriage can mess up a good relationship. Lol Friday evening, in speaking to her about conflict resolution in a marriage, I talkeds to her about men and women being wired differently. Told her we'll never get the Black Friday thing and didn't expect them to get opening day of hunting seasons. When I told her I'd never read the book Men are from Mars, Women are from Venu, I believed the title said a lot. Her responses to me about how that was talked about a lot in pre marriage counseling and how bible verses were used instead of hunting. I was very happy to hear that and threw my hands up, jokingly, and said the engagement encounter people had clearly done a much better job than I possibly could. Then I seriously told her I wish someone would've equipped me with that information way back cause it would've made for a more stable household for them, growing up.
Anybody who spends more on a wedding than the price of a down payment on a house is crazy and shouldn't be allowed to breed. I got invited to a wedding in Belize. The guy was from Baton Rouge and the girl from North Louisiana. Second marriages for both. Only way I was going was if they foot the bill. Which they weren't.
